Simply Misunderstood XO

Happy September y’all! Do you know what this month is!?
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🎗OVARIAN CANCER AWARENESS MONTH!🎗
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If you know me, you know my connection to this disease & why I advocate so hard to raise awareness.
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If you don’t, well then I’m gonna make sure you know what you need to know by the end of this month!
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That’s why you’ll be seeing my page #GoTeal for this month too!
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Cancer may have taken someone I love, but there are also so many things #CancerCannot do or take.
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I hope you’ll come on this journey with me & educate yourself if you aren’t already.
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I’ll share my story with you but I’ll also share what life’s like now…10 years later.
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Because #TealisABigDeal! 👗

I lost my mom to #ovariancancer when I was just 15 years old, a mere freshman in high school. So you can imagine how difficult it must’ve been going through those critical teenage years (and torturous high school drama) without a mom.
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It was dreadful I tell you and I don’t wish that feeling upon my worst enemy.
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I was depressed, scared, couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep. I found out the true meaning of “sobbing” at that point in my life.
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I used to think it would never get better. That I’d always feel that way – how couldn’t I? I lost the person I look up to most, my hero, my best friend, my own damn mother!
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But look at me now. 💁🏻‍♀️
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I’m here. I’m still alive. I‘m able to smile again. I’m able to enjoy life again.
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It’s not because I don’t miss her; I talk to her all the time.
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It’s not because I’ve forgotten about her; I think about her every day.
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It’s not because of my strength; I am often very upset about it.
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I can smile, enjoy and live life again because I know that’s what SHE would’ve wanted.
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And I never wanna let her down! 🙌🏼
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My motivation pushes me to educate because I didn’t realize back then how important it was to #KnowOvarian.
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Ovarian cancer accounts for MORE DEATHS than any other gynecological cancer, causing approximately 14,000 deaths each year.
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It’s time to get educated so you can prevent your sister, mother, grandma, aunt, daughter, cousin, friend, or even YOU from becoming a part of the statistic.
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With this being said, I encourage you all to find YOUR motivation and keep it locked in your mind, especially when you’re going through tough times. 🙏🏼

Travel. Take that stinkin’ trip! ✈️
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I never used to be one who liked to travel (just because I hated flying) and even though it’s still not my favorite thing to do, the experiences are totally worth it.
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You can be stuck in your little bubble every now and then and it’s refreshing to just get a change of scenery (and perspective) every once in awhile. 🙏🏼
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Cancer may have taken a piece of my heart that day with my mom, but #CancerCannot take away my ability to fight back and live life.
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Traveling has given me yet another reason to smile despite the last 10 years without her!
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You should give it a try too!

My mom was so genuine. She did anything and everything for the people she loved.
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She was also a total bitch to those who treated her badly. LOL
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I guess that’s where I get it from 😂
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But I wouldn’t have it any other way. 🙏🏼
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When you’re a strong, independent person like myself (and my mom) you forget that it’s okay to let go sometimes.
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Leaning into the love from others was not something I did until it was all I had left to turn to after I lost my mom.
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And trust me, at only 15 years old, I needed it.
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The point is, we all need a little lovin’ so don’t be afraid to ask for it! 🥰
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And if you see someone you love who could use a little lovin’ you need to get your butt in gear and show them the love they deserve!! 👊🏼
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I can’t even imagine how my mother felt when she was sick. It must’ve been so hard to love herself. 😞
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But I know there are women out there every day still going through this exact same thing.
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And it will continue because 1 in every 78 women will be diagnosed with #ovariancancer in their lifetime.
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SOMETHING NEEDS TO BE DONE ABOUT THIS! ⠀⠀
Visit one of these resources to find out how you can help, even if it’s just educating yourself!! @nocc_national @ocrahope @tealisabigdeal @tealsthedeal 

THIS is how I wear my #teal not just on National Wear Teal Day, but every day of #OvarianCancerAwarenessMonth!
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To me, this isn’t just a “fashion statement.” I would still have a mother to hug & hold if it weren’t for this horrible disease.
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The day she was taken from me I made a promise to myself that I would advocate and spread awareness so no family would have to go through what ours did.
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So now when people come up to me and ask “Why is your hair green?” I use it as an opportunity to EDUCATE!
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“No, it’s TEAL for Ovarian Cancer Awareness!”
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I’ve learned it’s okay if people don’t know what teal is yet, I didn’t at one point either!
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BUT the goal is to teach them before they wind up having to find out for themselves!
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Educate. Advocate. Fight Back! 👊🏼 #TEALtheresAcure

You know how scary it can be to allow yourself to be happy?
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It doesn’t seem that complicated though right? Like happiness is happiness it just comes and goes.
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But CHOOSING to be happy is completely different. Think about it…
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After my mom passed away from #ovariancancer when I was 15 years old, I was NOT in a good place nor did I ever think I was capable of being truly happy again.
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It takes a LOT of strength and courage to get yourself together and have a positive mindset on life after such a tragic event.
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“Her mother just died, why is she so happy?”
“It’s like she doesn’t even care.”
“Does she even have a heart? Omg”
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It was scary. I even asked MYSELF these things sometimes. If I was HAPPY what would people think!?
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This honestly has a lot to do with how concerned we are about what people think of us.
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If we always care about others’ opinions of us we’ll never be our true selves.
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So it’s taken me ‘til this day to keep that in mind. I can’t say I NEVER think about it, but I often try not to.
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Yes, I value opinions from those I love and care about.
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But ultimately, at the end of the day, it’s MY choice.
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I need to choose happiness.
You need to choose happiness.
We need to choose happiness.
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It all starts with the choice. And that requires quite a bit of bravery.
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But I have faith.
I believe.
You can do it too.
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And if you’re already there, I’m so dang proud of you! 👏🏼 It’s not easy.
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The world needs more happy people! Let yourself be one of them! 💕

I was only 15 when my mom lost her battle to #ovariancancer.
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The only damn graduation she got to see of mine was middle school, and that barely even counts. 🙄
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I know she was watching from above for all of the other ones, but that’s still not the same.
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And it wasn’t even like it was just one time I had to get through. I did that crap THREE different times!
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High School – 2012
College – 2016
Grad School – 2019
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It sucks, it really does. But all I thought about during those moments was how dang PROUD she would’ve been of me. 🙌🏼
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She would’ve been my biggest supporter, my loudest cheerleader, there in the front row every time! 😢🙏🏼
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So I try to celebrate the successes.
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Because just knowing how much I’m making her smile in heaven is a WIN in it of itself! 😇
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Cancer may have taken her from me, but #CancerCannot take away my accomplishments & the feeling I get knowing I’m making my mother proud.
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Some of you reading this may not even know me, but I know you would make her (and myself!) SO proud if you even learned just a liiittle bit about ovarian cancer.
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Heck! No better time than Ovarian Cancer Awareness Month right!?
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If you’re feeling like doing something good today and makin’ a fellow angel proud, then check out these pages for all of the resources you’ll need! –>  @nocc_national @ocrahope @worldovariancancer @worldovariancancerday @tealsthedeal
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😉💙💚

I try not to define myself by what happens to me, but there are about 3 or 4 significant events throughout my life which have clearly molded me into the woman I am today.
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When I look back I see these huge milestones as turning points in my journey of life. ⤴️⤵️
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They’re not kidding when they say it’s like a rollercoaster.
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I can say I’ve been unlucky, but the truth is I’m probably not that unlucky.
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There are people out there who have been through worse.
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Better yet, there are people out there who have probably been through LESS but haven’t grown enough throughout their journeys to gain a perspective on life not many have until it’s too late.
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So I’ll hold on to my experiences, my struggles, my heartbreaks, my STRENGTH. Because I wouldn’t be who I am today without them.
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And I’ll stand by what I’ve always said since the beginning…
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“Everything happens for a reason.” 🙏🏼

I’ve been doing at least one Walk/Run a year to benefit ovarian cancer awareness. Thank you @nocc_national / @nocc_newjersey / @nocc_nyc / @nocc_delval for putting on these events! 👏🏼
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🎗 AWARENESS IS KEY!🎗
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Why? Because when a woman is diagnosed and treated in the earliest stages, the 5-year survival rate is over 90%. HOWEVER, due to ovarian cancer’s non-specific symptoms and lack of early detection tests, only 19% of all cases are found at this early stage.
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We need to do our part and spread awareness to protect our sisters, mothers, daughters, aunts, cousins, grandmothers, and friends. Something needs to be done so no one has to endure what my family and I did 🙏🏼

For anyone who’s going through a tough loss right now – whether it’s a loved one, friend, a romantic relationship or even just any type of tough time – this one’s for you! 🙏🏼
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It can be SO freaking tough😞
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Some days you don’t think you’ll be able to get through it.
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But look at you! You’ve made it this far!
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This is your reminder not to give up!!
Don’t stop!!
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It’s okay to have bad days.
It’s okay to cry through the pain.
It’s also okay to smile through the pain.
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But just remember…
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When you come out the other side (& I know this from experience) it really is fucking BEAUTIFUL! 🙌🏼
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HANG IN THERE HONEY! 🍯
I’m rooting for you! 👏🏼😘

Let me hit ya with the #FACTS –
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🎗Ovarian cancer is the 8th most common cancer among women
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🎗Ovarian cancer is the FIFTH leading cause of cancer-related death among women
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🎗Ovarian cancer is the DEADLIEST of gynecologic cancers
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🎗ALL WOMEN are at risk of developing ovarian cancer
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♦️It is important to be aware of symptoms, risk factors and your family history on both your father’s and mother’s side of the family. ♦️
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I say this from experience too.
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❗️We didn’t know about the BRCA gene mutation that ran in our family.
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❗️We didn’t know it could happen to someone so young and healthy.
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❗️We didn’t know the signs & symptoms!
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Had we known, [she] would’ve insisted the doctors test her when she had bloating and abdominal pain.
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Had we known, [she] would’ve gotten tested for the BRCA gene mutation before she was ever sick.
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Had we known, it could’ve SAVED [her] LIFE.
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#KnowOvarian

There’s a lot of sayings and clichés for girls about finding the right guy or whatever.
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I think I’ve heard just about every one in the book.
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Some of them I absolutely love and others I’m like, “yeah okay I wish.” 🙄
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But no matter how cynical I get about still being single at 25 and a half years old, deep down I truly believe there is something out there waiting for me.
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Some type of love I’ve been dreaming of and yearning for. 💖
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Single ladies – we have to keep believing we’re worth more than the guy who doesn’t text back, goes “ghost”, or doesn’t treat us as an equal.
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No, don’t settle – there’s something better out there!
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We may not see it now, but I have HOPE that there is.
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And anywhere there is HOPE, there is POWER.
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Take back your power! Know your worth! Our time will come. 🙏🏼
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But let’s have a little fun in the meantime, okay? 😉

Losing someone so close causes you to change your outlook and perspective on life.
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➕You learn which things to sweat and which aren’t worth it.
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➕You learn how important it is to tell those you care about how much you love them.
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➕You learn life’s too short to be anything but happy.
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➕You learn who’s been there for you all along and who never really was.
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➕You learn not to take things for granted.
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➕You learn to live every day like it’s your last.
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But most importantly you learn how to laugh louder 🤣 love deeper💓& fight harder. 👊🏼
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Because you would do anything to get them back…
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Even if it’s just for one day.
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So that’s why I “FIGHT LIKE A GIRL” all year round, but especially in September.
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Just to give light 💡and say hey! There’s more to women’s cancer than just “pink.”
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Teal is a big deal too! 🙌🏼

Plain and simple.
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Sometimes we get blinded by those we WANT to be in our life, but aren’t necessarily meant to be there.
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Look to those who stay with you during tough times.
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Notice the ones who put in the effort.
The ones who will go out of their way to see how you’re doing, make plans, or just give you a quick call.
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It’s easy to get distracted by someone new and exciting who gives you attention.
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But be aware – that may not always last.

As September comes to an end I would just like to say a big THANK YOU to everyone who has helped spread the word about ovarian cancer this month – in any way, shape, or form!
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I am SOO excited to see the growing awareness within the community and beyond!
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BUT just because the month is over doesn’t mean we should stop educating!
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After all, cancer doesn’t stop battling so we can’t either! 👊🏼
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———BREAK THE SILENCE———
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This week is actually National Hereditary Breast and Ovarian Cancer (HBOC) Week, which marks the transition between National Ovarian Cancer Awareness Month and National Breast Cancer Awareness Month. 🎗
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The goal of #HBOC week is to recognize all those affected by a hereditary cancer, including…
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👉🏼 women and men with BRCA mutations
👉🏼 people with a history of cancer in their family
👉🏼 survivors and previvors of breast and ovarian cancer
👉🏼 individuals who have an increased risk of a hereditary cancer but have yet to develop the disease
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Being part of a family with a history of the #BRCA mutation gene, I am even more motivated to help spread awareness this week! Won’t you join me?
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Help spread awareness of hereditary cancers and start a conversation with your family to learn your risk. 🙏🏼 #HBOCweek #KnowOvarian

It’s #HBOC week so I’m going to keep this last one #TEAL! ☺️
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I really wanted to end my whole spiel about the importance of spreading awareness about ovarian cancer and all other hereditary cancers with this mantra. 👆🏼
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You don’t have to go through a big loss to change your mindset and put you on a better path in life.
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But unfortunately, in my case, as I’m sure along with many others, I was kind of forced to.
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After a big loss in your life you can choose to lay down and give up, cry every single day, feel like life’s not worth living anymore…
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OR you can choose to let it motivate you.
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It’s honestly all about perception.
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If you THINK you’ll never be able to move on, you won’t.
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If you THINK that everything bad happens to you, it will.
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It’s getting yourself to stay positive and look at the brighter side of things.
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In no way, shape, or form is losing a loved one a good thing by ANY means.
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HOWEVER, if you THINK of all of the lessons that could come out of it, you just might be able to get on the path of being able to smile again.
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Your life is worth living; no loss is big enough to change that.
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YES you’ll feel terrible, like it’s even the end of the world.
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BUT it’s the power of your THOUGHTS (and some support from friends & family) that will get you through! 💕
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And if you feel like you don’t have that motivation or support around you, well you got me girlfranddd (or boyfranddd)! 😘
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Please believe in yourself, and give it a shot! 🙏🏼

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𝙭𝙤𝙭𝙤
𝙈𝙏𝘾